I am sitting in the car with tears flowing. I am listening to my Ipod. Taylor Swift, The Best Day is blaring into my ears. The next song will be Never Grow Up, but I haven’t gotten to that song just yet because I keep playing “The Best Day” over and over (and over again…) I am torturing myself, I know this but yet, I still do it.
Vacation is over. I am sad. I know I should be thinking that this was the best vacation ever- because it was! But I am not, I sit here sad….
I have no choice but to deal with the harsh reality that my sweet Zozo is going away to college in a few weeks. BYU Idaho. Idaho, over 1700 miles away from Livonia Michigan, Away from me! I have been able to “not deal with it” because we had so many other things happening. I could just push it to the side and not think about it. I kept telling myself I will deal with it when our NC vacation is over , and now it’s over…
I could never imagine how difficult this would be, ever.. It’s like her first day of Kindergarten all over again. All of the worries I had that day are flooding back into me as I sit here in the beast with my feet kicked up and chair reclined a little bit. All I can think of is:
What if others are mean to her? What if no one will play with her on the playground? What if she gets sick? What if she gets hurt? What if she cries?
Why cant we freeze time just for a little while? And then after that “little while” why can we freeze it again, just a little while longer…….